Four mantras to help you survive Christmas
Written by Tribe Leader, Beck Horne
Whilst I love all things Christmas, as the big day gets closer, I am starting to get a bit apprehensive about the prospect of last minute shopping fatigue; ruffled family feathers; turkey overindulgence and party season burnout.
In chatting with fellow Tribe Leader, Liska and her fondness for using words to help her move through life with grace, we have come up with four mantras to help you stay calm, relaxed and smiling during this festive season.
1. Mantra on gift giving:
Much of the Christmas overwhelm comes from thinking about what to buy, buying the gift, then wrapping the gift (often covertly). The joyous part is the giving. Often we lose sight of this as we battle the crowds at the shopping mall and spend so much time, energy and moula on finding the perfect gift.
Mantra: “I see you. I noticed. You Matter.”
Repeat this each time you are thinking of a gift, buying that gift or wandering around the shops aimlessly not knowing what gift to buy. The act of giving a gift is about letting that person know they are in your thoughts. They matter to you. And when you genuinely hold them in your thoughts, the ideal gift will come to you.
2. Mantra on family gatherings
Christmas is an opportunity to spend time celebrating with those dearest to our hearts. It can also be an opportunity for said dear ones to drive us nuts! So how can you have a relaxing family gathering and navigate the niggles, nit-picking and not so nice ways that can lead to some verbal boxing even before Boxing Day?
Choosing not to supress how we feel and speaking our truths gently to the ones that matter so dearly, creates an opportunity for release. For example a family member may have forgotten how to be present when showing up at family gatherings. She is always on the periphery of conversation, her attention instead focused on her iPhone news feed. It annoys the hell out of you. You’ve had previous opportunities to speak up but have said nothing. It feels heavy.
Mantra: Speak your truth gently from a place of love and compassion.
Challenge yourself to speak your truth at the next family gathering. It can be done with kindness and compassion. The conversation might go like this….”Listen Amy, I love it when we spend time together as a family. But when you’re looking at your phone while we’re talking, it makes me feel like you’re not present here with me. I’d love it if you could put your phone away while we enjoy this day together. Sound ok?” The feelings of annoyance at past behaviours will be released.
You’ve spoken your truth. Heaviness is lifted.
3. Mantra on festive season indulgence
It feels good to enjoy good food and wine with our families and friends. What doesn’t feel good is to overindulge and face feelings of guilt and regret afterwards.
Plan how you want to feel after Christmas lunch
If having all the foods you enjoy and seconds on the pudding is what you plan to do –no regrets– go for it! What feels crunchy is when there is no plan; overindulgence happens and regret follows as soon as you put your dessert spoon down.
If the plan is to enjoy the turkey roast then skip dessert because you know you want to feel good about your choices, stick with your plan. You’ll feel good for it.
4. Mantra on festive socialising
The key takeaway on festive socialising is to remember it’s about spending time being present with the people in our lives that matter. By showing up, we are acknowledging to others they matter to us. By carving out time in a busy calendar to share a meal or a night out, we are saying to our communities I belong to you. You belong to me. We are in this together.
For those occasions when you’d rather eat bark than go to another Christmas party, what then? You’ve tried to dig deep into your party reserves. Nada.
Put on a red dress
These five simple words work wonders for those occasions when the party tank is empty. Put on a red dress. Trust me. It works. When I’ve really, REALLY not wanted to go to a Christmas do, I light a candle then put on my favourite red dress. It lifts my spirits immediately. I go from wanting to stick blu-tak in my ears at the sound of Christmas carols, to humming along with Mr Buble singing jingle bells. Oh and for some added punch, frilly red knickers with your red dress girlfriend.
Wishing you our treasured Tribal community a Happy Christmas and relaxing, restful holiday xx